Today is the one year anniversary of my grandmother's death. She was 101. She was ready to die. If truth be told, she had been ready to die for quite some time. I spent most of that week at her bedside, talking to her, reading, thinking about the present and the future. I knew the morning my mom called me and asked me to go see her, that this was the end, and four days later it was. I don't know why, but I knew.
My gramma was very special to me and I loved her very much. I love her very much. She was a kind, god-loving, generous, woman who always ready for a visit, never being angry if it was quick. She loved her children, grandchildren and great-grandchildren ferociously. She was bossy in her later years and made me laugh sometimes after the 10th time she had asked me the same question. She was/is a woman I aspire to be.
Today I went to visit her, along with Kaedo and Craig, and she was happy. I know that sounds funny, but I know she is with her son, and grandson and God, and she is looking down on us and smiling.
I have cried a lot today. When I spoke with my dad, when I wrote to my aunt, when I went to see her. But tomorrow I will get up and say, "a year ago today she was already gone", and it will be time for me to get past the sadness of this week.
There will always be things I didn't say that I wish I had, but one thing I know for sure is that my gramma knew I loved her. That is something I must never forget.
1 comment:
What a lovely post, Shannon! We know it has been a tough day for you but we know that she was in good hands last year when you were watching out for her. She truly was an amazing woman and whenever I think about her, which is often, I can't get over how she kept her spirits high through all the heartbreaking happenings in her life. She was so strong in spirit, attitude, love and I know that you have inherited so much of that from her. She truly knew you loved her and she was there when you needed someone to talk to. She was and is a most wonderful lady.
Love to all
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