I am what doctors would call morbidly obese. Morbidly seems a bit like overkill when you follow it with obese, but that's what it is. I have struggled with my weight for many years and my amazing sister has fought tooth and nail to get me on track, with disappointment each and every time. But she's never given up. Never. These days Craig and I are working a program that she is doing along with mom and it is working so far. I must admit, working it with Craig is a bit like telling Kaedo he could stand to lose 5lbs. My husband is perfect, to me.
I guess in saying all this I want to say that I know I'm fat - there is no dispute about that, but I truly and honestly believe that the above quote is true. Even when (and I do say when) I lose the weight, I will never be model thin, I will never look like I did when I was 16. I hope to be happier, healthier and be around to see my children give me grandchildren. At this size, that is not a given. What is important about this quote is that it reminds us that in most cases others decide how beautiful we are, and when you are my size, you aren't beautiful at all. Allowing others to decide how we feel about ourselves, whether it be in your face or passively aggressive is wrong. Can we stand to lose some weight? For most of us the answer is yes. Different amount for different people. But am I beautiful? I like to think I am. I am a good mom whose children love her, I work hard to be a good wife, I try to be a daughter my parents can be proud of and a sister that can be called a friend. Those things make me beautiful, when the social norms or how big or small I am don't. I must hold on to that. MUST. Because if I don't, really, I have nothing.
image copied from stephaniehowell.typepad.com
2 comments:
We think you're beautiful both inside and out. We are very happy that you are trying so hard to develop and healthy lifestyle. It is so much more fun when the whole family is involved. Sterling said that he just loved going to the gym and the bonus was that it was a family outing. Baba told him that he'd done 20 minutes of cardio last week. Sterling said, Oh Baba, that's great. Then baba told him that was for the whole week. Sterling roared with laughter.
One step and one day at a time Shannon. We want you to feel the joy of being able to run and play with your grandchildren. It is a beautiful and wonderful experience. You can do it!
Love to all
Shannon - Stan & I also think you are beautiful both inside and out. We love you for who you are and always have. You are a wonderful wife, mother, daughter, sister and we consider you our daughter as well - not a daughter-in-law. We are also very proud of all you have accomplished over the years we have known you. You are a very, very talented young woman and we have lots of wonderful things you have made for us over the years. We wish you all the best with the program that you're working on and with all the support you have with your family, you will do well! Sounds like Sterling is enjoying the gym and it would be fun as a whole family. Love you so much.
We went over to visit with mom this afternoon and decided we'd take her out for coffee over to the southside Coop service station - it's only about a block away. We dressed her warm and Linda drove the car close to the building and got her settled. She seemed to enjoy the outing but it always confuses her so much. Linda and I took her back and got her settled and then told her we had to go home to make supper for our men - she said - why can't they come here for supper!
Hope everyone had a good day - BIG HUGS TO ALL!
Post a Comment