Sad News All Around

On Friday we learned that one of the boys' teachers had died. She had Cancer and had fought a valiant fight for many years, returning to the classroom numerous times after seeking treatment. Ultimately, like in so many cases, this disease that plagued her for many years finally took her life.

She was instrumental in helping Craig and I with starting Sterling on the path to better learning and was loved by many for her stern teaching and heart of gold. She loved the children she taught and teaching was not a job but a calling.

As Sterling is leaving for a weeks vacation tonight, he is heading to the viewing later this afternoon to pay his respects to the family. He and Craig will attend together, and he will then leave from there on his trip. Kaedo and I will attend the funeral tomorrow afternoon and pay our respects at that time.

It's funny, I don't believe in a funeral for myself, and when I die the boys know that I do not want a funeral of any type. A simple cremation and a flushing of the ashes would be just fine. My only request is don't bury me or spread my ashes where you live. I never want them to feel they would be unable to move because 'mom was in the backyard'.

However, for the majority, a funeral is an integral part of the dying process. Many people plan their funerals as they want them to be (and thank you for that - in the midst of grief, it is much better to have it planned than to leave that to your spouse or children to decide), and have viewings and funerals and teas. I think this is such an individual choice, that while I don't believe in them for myself, I still attend. Not to say goodbye to the dead, because after all, when possible, it is much better to say goodbye to the living, but to pay my respects to the family. In this case it is important that they see how many lives she touched. It is important that they know that their mom and wife was instrumental in forming the lives of so many young children. I know what she did for us, and I think that while I do not know the family, the strength in numbers that will attend, will attest to the fact that she was beloved. Not just to them but to many.

While I never plan to have a funeral, a wake or even a tea when I die, I hope that the people that know me will honor my children by thinking of me kindly.